6-month cancer-versary/anniversary

Sunday, 7/19, was the 6 month anniversary of my diagnosis. It feels like so long ago! Since then, I've been living life in 2-week cycles, but that's about to end! My last chemo is this Friday!! 😁🙌👍👐👏👏 my white blood count is low again so I'm getting 3 Neupogen shots again this week (I'm actually going to be late to the appointment because I'm sitting here writing this instead of driving through rush hour to the hospital). Whatever it takes to get me to the finish line.

The future is still uncertain. When is my next PET? What's it going to show? Do I need radiation? When do I get my port taken out? Why is my hair so grey now? (that one is not that mysterious actually) What if the cancer comes back? How do I deal with that back-of-the-mind fear enough to live a normal life? How's my fertility going to be affected? (hey ovaries, how YOU doing?) What short hairstyles am I going to try to rock?

You know, the usual questions about the future.

Monday 7/20 was my 6 month wedding anniversary! There's a certainty in my life and that's Damien. He's been a wonderful caretaker and puts me miles ahead of himself. He actually just kinda yelled at me about making sure I eat and said I "can't use my butt fat to create blood cells" because I have enough fat to live off of for a few days. Joking aside, you don't have to worry about me not eating. I'm not starving myself and I'm +20 lbs since my diagnosis.

Alright, I have procrastinated rush hour driving enough..

Cycle 6, go!

So here's what the day of infusion #11 looked like. This is pretty much the every chemo day looks like: 

7:30 - Wake up
7:31 - Fight off wave of anticipatory nausea to get out of bed
7:32 - Crouch on ground for a few mins to get over sharp bone pain in my lower back
7:33 - Try to poop so I can prepare for a weekend of constipation (twas a success yesterday)
7:45 - Brush teeth and dry heave into sink because anticipatory nausea is a real bitch
7:50 - Take Kilby up to his litter box (he doesn't have constipation problems.. He has the opposite problem of go-wherever-whenever)
8:00 - Prepare breakfast of everything bagel with cream cheese and smoked salmon. Eat breakfast. Take a Prilosec to help with digestion and acid problems after chemo.
8:25 - Get dressed (which is just changing from PJs into practically-PJs of yoga pants and t-shirt)
8:30 - Pack my chemo bag with my tablet, headphones, extra charger, snacks, nausea meds and Doctor Who blanket
8:40 - Apply numbing cream to my port in preparation for access
8:45 - Leave house and drive to cancer center
9:17 - Arrive at cancer center, check in, head on back, and say hi to all the nurses and tech and phlebotomist.
9:30 - My chemo nurse access my port to draw blood for the CBC. She has trouble because my blood isn't coming out smoothly (it has air bubbles and is frothing, what??). She pumps the syringe a few times and all is good. I take an ativan to help with nausea.
9:50 - blood counts are good and the nurse starts me on my pre-meds
9:50 - 12:15 - bags and bags of meds are infused into me. I spend the time talking to other patients and Damien, snapchatting, instagramming and IMing people.
12:15 - Done! We head to Hoodys for some philly cheesesteaks.
1:00 - I am full and content. The pre-meds are helping with the nausea but they knock me out. I fall asleep in the car immediately and wake up to us arriving home.
1:30 - Change back into PJs and crawl into bed. Sleeeeeeep.  Just a warning - everything after this is hazy because I'm groggy for the rest of the day.
5:30ish - Wake up feeling like bloated swollen crap. Yell out for Damien and he comes to try to make me feel better by doing any of the following - AC higher/lower, ceiling fan on/off, blankets on/off, more water, more pills, less sunlight.
6:30ish - Get out of bed and get hungry. Send Damien out to forage for food (sometimes he cooks but my preferences change constantly)
7:15 - Eat dinner and immediately get sleepy again
8:00 - Try to stay awake watching TV
11:00 - 11:30 - Spend too much time trying to stay awake. Take meds for constipation and hope for a better poop day tomorrow. Go to bed. 

#chemo #11 today with first appearance by Damien's finger. It's the start of cycle 5. Only 1 more infusion after this!! #hodgkinslymphoma #cancer

A photo posted by Karen (@thekaren) on Jul 10, 2015 at 8:08am PDT

 

What bad blood return from my port looks like. The nurse had to pump the syringe thing a few times to get it flowing. #hodgkinslymphoma #chemo

A video posted by Karen (@thekaren) on Jul 10, 2015 at 8:10am PDT

oh man, I look terrible :( this is where I sit for 3 hours.

Cycle 6 is about to start!

My last cycle starts tomorrow!!!!

The last treatment kicked my damn ass. It took me 6 days to start feeling normal again. That means 6 days of bad fatigue, nausea, hot flashes and general crappiness. I couldn't work from home on Monday because my brain just wouldn't work. Not being able to form sentences or think things through is the worst feeling for me. I worked half a day on Tuesday and finally was able to work a full day on Wednesday. Work has been busy and it does a good job of making time fly. I don't know what I'd do all day at home if I didn't work.. Probably play dumb cooking games, watch Netflix and be completely unproductive. Actually, that doesn't sound too bad haha.

My CBC last week showed that my white blood count was way low so I had to get 3 Neupogen shots this week. They're supposed to boost it enough so I can get my infusion on Friday. The shots are causing me major bone pain in my lower back. Let's hope they work!

Can you believe I'll be done with chemo soon?! This month will mark 6 months since my diagnosis. It'll also be 6 months since Damien and I got married :)

Also, my brother is done with college today!!